Getting Real

Ok, so this post may be a little heavy. Consider yourself warned.
You see, I've really been struggling with a few things lately. I think I've mentioned in a few of my previous posts that I am frustrated with where I am in life. It was really funny a couple of weeks ago - I was praying and I told God that even though I wasn't where I wanted to be, I knew I was where He had me and I was ok with that. Ha! So the next morning I get a call from a friend telling me she's pregnant! Real quick I realized what a test that was. God was seeing if I really meant that. And after a day of crying about it, I do mean it.

Here's the deal. I'm just not doing enough for God. Now that may sound odd to some, but let me explain.
Our pastor has been preaching the last couple of weeks on time, talents, and treasures. One thing he keeps asking is "Does your life represent how big our God is?"
Wow. Slap me in the face!

Here's the problem. It's so easy to get caught up in the mundane tasks of every day life. How do you live life to the fullest each day? I honestly don't know the answer to that.
How can I sit in my cubicle for 8 hours and live it up? Maybe I'm just not being creative enough.

See God's plan for me started way before I was born. And the circumstances I have been through were not just for kicks. Obviously I went through them for a reason. Yes to make me stronger, but for what?

I'm truly sick of living a normal life. God didn't call for us to be normal. We are supposed to live a life that is evidently different and there are so many areas that mine is not different.

How do I get there?

I desperately want my life to reflect the hugeness of our God. He is so extraordinary and amazing - how can I mirror that? I want to reach people for Him. I want to tell people that there is so much more to this life than the mundane 8-5 job. There is a God who is waiting for each of us and who wants to love us like no other. Every day I am so amazed by who HE is and amazed that HE chose me. That He loves me despite all my shortcomings. That HE has a plan for ME. No matter how small I think I am, HE has made a way for me to be a part of HIS ultimate plan.
How amazing is that?
He knows my name.
He knows my every thought.
And the best part is that HE cares.

There is no other god in all of history that cared for his people and came to save them. That amazes me. It amazes me how much proof there is of this amazing God I serve everywhere I look.

So my question is - How do I reflect that? How do I live a life that is worthy of the calling He has for me?