This Is A Hard Day

Today, May 3, is exactly 4 years since I found my mom dead.
This my friends, is not a good day for me.
It's so strange how when I think about the scenario, I can literally feel all of those emotions over again.
See, my mom was my absolute best friend.
And I never thought in a million years that I would have lost her when I was 22.
She was supposed to be here for all my major life events.
We were going to take a vacation to the West.
She was going to be the best grandmother ever.
She was just supposed to be here.
But God had other plans.
4 years ago, she died peacefully in her sleep from what we think was a heart attack. At age 48.
Too young.
I know that I'm not supposed to question God, and I don't.
I just know that there's a gaping hole in my life and I really feel like I've never been the same since that day 4 years ago.
She fell asleep reading her bible that night. What a way to go.
I miss her so much. It's really amazing how many times a day I think about her.
I really miss her hugs.
And her smile.
And her laugh.
And her love.
And everything else about the wonderful woman she was.


  1. Just remember she will always be with you and sees every big moment in your life, even if not in the physical state

  2. Ditto to what Heather said! I'm so sorry for your loss. *HUGS*

  3. I'm so sorry for your loss. At 48 at to, it doesn't seem right.. I hope you can lean on your hubby today!

  4. She left so soon, you're right. But Heather is right too, she's always with you and she must have been proud of you :)