6/10/11

Healing.

So just a warning...this post will talk about my monthly visitor.
You know, Aunt Flow.
If you don't want to hear about her, don't read.
But if you do, I promise it's not nasty.

Okie dokie.....
I'm pretty sure I've said before that I have PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome).
This lovely ailment has caused me to never have a regular period and does not allow me to get pregnant on my own.
It is also the source of my weight gain.
I went on birth control at 15 to regulate my period. When I got married, I went off of it and gained 65 pounds in a year. Of course that alarmed the doc and with lots of testing, we found that PCOS was the culprit.
So pretty much for 7 years I've been off of the pill. I have two to four periods in a year on my own.

And it's also no secret that I want a baby....really really bad. I mean most couples have their first child within a couple years of being married. Not almost seven. And God has heard my cries and seen my tears in the most awful of ways.

But something has happened in the last six months.
You see, since January, I have had a regular cycle every month.
EVERY month. NEVER happened.
I've been joking with Chris that "maybe God decided to heal me".

But then something hit me tonight.
Why am I joking about that?
Do I not trust God's promises enough to believe that He could/has truly healed me?
Or am I just scared this is some fluke?
Why wouldn't I boldly declare that this is only the works of God?
And no, I'm not pregnant now, but the fact of having a regular cycle is something awesome in itself....something most girls take for granted and hate.

And then.....THEN....I ran across this tonight:

This is what the Lord says: "I have heard your prayers and seen your tears. I will heal you."
~2 Kings 20:5

And of course there's this song by Hillsong:

You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease

I trust in You
I trust in You

I believe You're my Healer
I believe You are all I need
I believe You're my Portion
I believe You're more than enough for me
Jesus You're all I need

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible for You
You hold my world in Your hands

Hmmmmmm.

2 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing this. I truly believe God heals, maybe not when we want it but he eventually does when the time is right!

    I believe, almost positive that I have PCOS. I have been married for 4 years this year and we do not have any children. I also, may only get 2-4 periods a year on my own. I'm really out of luck because I don't have health insurance... and that makes it that much harder knowing I have PCOS and knowing I can't do a darn thing about it. I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I will never have kids, which has made me bitter towards mothers and I've started taking the stance that I don't want a kid anyways. I want to experience pregnancy but I'm happy with my family of 2 :)

    Sorry for the rant, but thank you for sharing this. May God Bless you :)

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  2. Whoot!!! God's abundance is so good!

    So, just HOW much do you want this baby right now? If you're running on schedule: Count out a week from when Auntie F showed up, then WMS every day for the following two weeks.(WMS = wild monkey s*x) Why for two weeks? Just to be quadruply extra sure you hit the right day!

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